Over the years of being involved in bondage, I’ve heard many misconceptions about and around kink and kinky people. A lot of the time, the people making these statements don’t realise that I’m kinky. Other times, these are the common perceptions provided by the ‘mainstream’ media:
- Kink attracts people from all walks of life. There isn’t a business sector I know of, that I haven’t met someone in the scene who’s involved.
- Kink appeals across the ages too : both physical ages in the present, and throughout the ages of history.
- There’s also no boundary of wealth in the scene. I know very keen players (both submissive and dominant) on basic benefits, similarly others who are extremely wealthy.
- There are of course idiots in the scene, just as there are out of the scene. But the loud vocal minority do not represent the larger great majority.
- To be kinky, you do not have to have had a troubled childhood.
- Not everyone lives kink 24/7. Some people just do it in the bedroom, and sometimes they have sex without any kink at all!
- Not every guy in the scene is an overweight balding sweaty guy who works in politics, and has to visit a professional Dominatrix each week to get his fix.
- If the guy is a sub they don’t always wear a gimp mask.
- If the guy is a Dom, they don’t always wear a leather waistcoat and have a goatee beard.
- Not every female Domme in the scene has the body of a model, wearing a tight catsuit, thigh high boots, and wielding a leather riding crop.
- No female sub wants to be non-consensually manhandled and propositioned by strangers, especially in public.
- ‘subs’ with a profile online, will not immediately submit to a random Dominant stranger who contacts them.
- Not everyone in the scene is in an open/poly relationship.
- My kink may not be your kink, but you don’t always have to share your opinion with me about it.
- If you like to be tied up, you like bondage. But that doesn’t mean you’re always and suddenly on the slippery slope to more extreme activities.